


Almost

by Kahvi



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-12
Updated: 2013-05-12
Packaged: 2017-12-11 17:02:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/801030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kahvi/pseuds/Kahvi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Data cannot love Tasha. It is not a problem he can solve, though he does try.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Almost

**Author's Note:**

> The very first fan fiction story I ever published, 10 years ago!

They were moving together like one person, their two bodies intertwined to the point where none of them knew where one ended and the other began, and none of them cared. Not now, in this moment where time seemed to move in ways Data knew were not possible, and yet he experienced them. Tasha didn't seem to notice at all. He envied her that, among so many other things. Not that it mattered, not really. In this moment, there was only instinct and programming; running on automatic. Giving in to desire, at least for one of them. The sensation of skin against skin, two warm bodies moving as one. The two of them, as one, forever. It seemed like forever. But then it was over.

As she slept, he watched her body move with her breathing. Such a strong, esthetically pleasing body. She always slept, afterwards. She had incredible stamina, almost a match to his, which was virtually inexhaustable. Sometimes he worried - in his own way - that he was hurting her, that she was hurting herself. But she always wanted more, and it seemed impossible to resist. So he never did. Afterwards, she would collapse in spasms of laughter and joy, kissing him and making him laugh in response. It was part of his programming, and it only made her laugh more. He knew he didn't sound real. Or look real. At least he seemed to feel real, to her.

She often told him she loved him. He always found himself unable to respond, but she didn't seem to mind. He found that satisfactory about her. She knew what he was, she knew his limitations, and she loved him for them. Not for what he could do, but for who he was. The room was hot; she prefered it that way. He had never asked why, though he would sometimes wonder about it even as they were making love. The heat made her body glisten with sweat, like that time, the first time. He still remembered. Maybe she did too. Maybe that was the reason? At any rate it did not matter. He was wet too now, all over. Like her. He raised a pale golden hand and observed it calmly. Wet. Like her.

He never slept, and so he came to her at night, even when she had not called for him. It had begun that way, her calling him during sleepless nights, him coming over and finding her naked on the bed, waiting. She had said she needed a good fuck, and who was he to argue? But they ended up making love. He was only dimly aware of the difference, but something in his programming told him so. And so they made love. It came to be every night neither of them were on duty, and some times even on nights when they were. Once, he snuck into her room and hid in her shower, taking her - quite literaly - by surprise. She had loved that. Just like she loved him; that had been the first night she had told him so.

"Love". Such an elusive concept. He didn't know what it was, not really. He knew the definition, of course, but you can never fully explain an emotion to someone who has never experienced them. Data knew he would probably never know love as humans did, which seemed somehow wrong. When someone like Tasha could love him, could want to be with him rather than the other, emotionally available men on the ship, it was not fair to her that he could not return the feeling. In as much as he had needs and wants, he found himself wanting that. Wanting it for her.

 

She stirred in her sleep, her eyes opening for a moment, seeing him still sitting there, and she smiled with sleepy eyes. He smiled back, stroking her cheek as she fell back into sleep again. Something inside him cried out to him, telling him something he desperately wanted to understand. When they parted that morning, she kissed him goodbye and said "I love you", as usual. A quick, happy grin and a wave, and she was gone, leaving him in her all too empty quarters. A word came to him, and he whispered it softly; "almost."


End file.
